Friday, 6 December 2013

And You're Still Married

Overheard: And you’re still married. (Group of 40ish guys at a table, all in suits and ties, all wearing wedding bands.)

Where it took me: This was half a question, half a statement; probably in response to something silly that one guy did; one of those things we do that we wish we hadn’t, but nothing that rips out the roots of a strong relationship. Adrienne Rich wrote: “An honorable human relationship — that is, one in which two people have the right to use the word “love” — is a process, delicate, violent, often terrifying to both persons involved, a process of refining the truths they can tell each other … It is important to do this because we can count on so few people to go that hard way with us.” I can’t get her words out of my head.

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